The brilliant queer film Sagar Bonda is now streaming on Netflix. Subhash K Jha in conversation with its director Rohan Kanawade
Photo:SNS
Besides the curly hair, how much of your life do you share with the protagonist of your film?
Besides the curly hair, only the part of this character where he has to go to the village, and has to go through the marriage pressure and where his father was a driver, and his mother is illiterate, and yet they both accepted him. And only these parts are from my own life. Although the character Anand in the film is working in the call center, I studied interior designing and now I’m making films. So, yeah, only these things, parents’ background and the experience of grieving my father in the village and going through that suicide, that pressure that everyone was putting on me, that has come from my life.
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How tough was it for you to make a film on a theme as sensitive as homosexuality in rural India?
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Basically, writing this film as tenderly as I could was something that I was always thinking about because, along with sexuality, there is also grief. So, I wanted to portray grief as honestly as I could. But of course, the film is not about grief, film is mainly a love story because I wanted to reimagine that whole phase of my life or the experience that I had during those 10 days of mourning for my father. Making this love story feel organic during this grieving period, that was the biggest challenge for me.
This is why the film feels so grounded and real?
Yes, the whole film feels more lived in; the moments feel lived in. And I took that as inspiration to make everything believable, the real life that I’ve experienced, which allowed me to incorporate this organic feel to it. I think that was the hardest part, making people believe that this can happen during that time.
Your film addresses the theme of homosexuality in a village in Maharashtra. Do you feel it is tougher to be gay in rural India?
I think it’s very individual. I don’t think every queer person experiences the same life, not only in the city, but also in the villages. Like, even in the city, you will meet queer people who say that they never felt bullied, and you will meet people who say that they experienced bullying. Similarly, when I spoke to some (I have a few friends from the rural side, and when I spoke to them)some of them said that they never faced bullying in the village, but there were other people who faced bullying in the village. So, I think it’s a very individual experience. The only problem is that our films only depict bullying. They don’t depict the other, more sensitive response to homosexuality. That is why it was important for me to use the positive side that I experienced in my life and show that on the screen as well.
We tend to see gay people as traumatised?
The problem is to create drama; filmmakers only rely on that trauma side of any story. And similarly in queer storytelling, people are only focusing on that trauma, the struggle or the tragedies. But there are queer people in the cities and even in rural villages who have experienced positive things, but no one talks about that. And that’s why everyone thinks that being gay is always a struggle, that being gay means your life is doomed. That’s what everyone thinks, but that is not true. I know some people who come from very remote villages of Maharashtra, from poor families, whose parents are farmers. And these kids have come out to their families, and their families have accepted them. But how many know about this kind of story? No one knows about this kind of story. That is why it was important for me to show that being gay doesn’t mean your life is going to be tough all the time. And that is why I think that it’s completely an individual experience. There are people whose life was tough, but there are also people whose life was not that tough.
And they were happy with their sexuality as well.
As a gay man yourself, how difficult has it been for you to keep your head above water?
First of all, I think I don’t consider my sexuality as my identity. It’s a very personal part of my life. I was not seeking acceptance from anyone. So whenever I introduce myself, I introduce myself as a filmmaker. I don’t really share my sexuality with the whole world. And what was important to me was that I had to at least tell my parents. So they know how I want to live my life. And thankfully, I had parents who are loving and understanding. Although my father is not there, when I came out to him, he immediately said that ‘you know about yourself, that’s most important’. Similarly, when I told my mother, she also accepted it. I think I’m lucky in that sense. I know there are some people who had to go through struggles and so many things. But in my case, it didn’t happen.
How easy was it for you to accept your own sexuality?
I didn’t have to even struggle to accept myself. That didn’t happen to me. I didn’t have to hide anything. I have a partner, and both our families are involved in our relationship. So, you know, things were really different in that sense. I think when you have understanding parents, things are always different. So personally, I didn’t face any discrimination.
Have you found love in your life?
Yes, I have found love. I stay with my partner. It’s been 11 years since we have been staying together. And as I said, our families are involved. My partner’s nephew, who’s the youngest in our family, is just five years old, and he’s very close to me, you know.
In your film, your protagonist Anand’s love story is given a happy ending. Is that your wishful thinking?
I don’t really consider it a happy, happy end. I consider it a more hopeful or optimistic end. And I always wanted that because I’m really tired of the fact that whenever people want to include sexuality in any film, those films mostly end tragically. And, you know, I’m like, why? I mean, why does this end tragically all the time? We had a preview screening, and I got to know that some students were not really ok with the ending. And then you suddenly realise, you know, why? I don’t understand why people have a fascination with sadness in the films. And I was not inspired by films. I was inspired by life when I was making this film. And I know so many, so many people have found their happiness. I’m not saying happiness as in they have found someone, but they have found their happiness. I know so many people who live alone, and they say, ‘I am completely happy on my own. I am not looking for any partner or I never feel that only when I have a partner, I am happy. I am happy with myself, and I have no problems with that.’ So, you know, happiness can be different for different people, but there are happy people in the world. But why only when we make films, is there romanticising sadness?
The protagonist’s equation with his mother is beautiful. How much of that comes from your own life?
Actually, most of those things come from the relationship that my partner had with his mother. We lost her two years back. And basically, me and my mother are very quiet. But my partner and his mother used to talk a lot. My partner and his mother also used to express love to each other. Like, you know, they used to hug. He used to put his head in her lap. I never experienced these kinds of moments with my mother. So, I thought this film would actually give me that chance to incorporate something that I didn’t experience myself. So, yeah, that relationship was mostly inspired by my partner and his relationship with his mother.
Where and how did you find these wonderful actors?
It took us a long time to find these actors, mainly these two boys. It took us three years. So first, I found Bhushan, the protagonist, one of my actor friends, Abhay Kulkarni, who had shared Bhushan’s Instagram with me. And when I saw Bhushan’s pictures and some videos that he had uploaded, I thought, look-wise, he is just perfect. And then my casting director, Yuvendra Deshpande, reached out to him, and we asked him to come for the audition. But before that, he gave him the idea of the film and what we are looking for. And he was completely okay with it because he really thought that the idea was interesting. And he came for the audition. And his audition was really amazing, really amazing. And the kind of performance I needed, he really delivered that in his audition. And even my casting director, he was like, he’s just perfect. I told Bhushan, you studied acting, and you’ve been doing theatre. I’m sure you have actor friends, and if you know anyone who might fit this other character. He immediately said that his best friend is from the same region. And I was like, oh, that’s amazing. Can I see him? And he showed me his pictures. And when I saw Suraj Suman’s pictures, I was like, I think he’s just perfect for Balya. But then I needed to hear his voice. I needed to hear his dialect because I really wanted that authenticity in the dialect. And so I called him. Bhushan called Suraj, and I spoke to Suraj on the call; hearing his dialect, I knew this was what I needed. And I asked him, would you like to do this film? And he agreed. I never took Suraj’s audition. I finalised him just like that.
Is your next film also going to be on a similar queer theme?
No, no, no, no. People quickly start boxing people. Okay, now he’s made a queer film. So he’s only going to make that. And then by doing that, people also limit you as a filmmaker. But I get inspired by so many other stories, right? I mean, I am also interested in making films with dinosaurs. I’m also interested in making a horror film.
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