Emotions are an intrinsic part of our lives. While some people are more adept at controlling and not revealing that side, while others lack this strategic capability.
Whichever category you belong to, there will be many situations at work when you may experience an overwhelming sense of emotion. Being overlooked for a promotion or position you believe you deserved, being harassed intentionally by a superior, a client shouting or haranguing you in a wrong way.
However, in a professional setting, you are always advised to restrain yourself and express your opinions or feelings in a more composed manner lest you hamper your image. Sometimes, fairly decent and well-behaved people when overwhelmed by emotions or in a fit of anger tend to go on a verbal rampage in front of their managers or colleagues. This can scar your image and may overshadow all the good you have done so far.
Whenever confronted with such a situation, it is extremely important to maintain your composure and not come across as a volatile individual. Always remember and remind yourself that a violent or ugly outburst will never be of any help.
It will only serve to further worsen the situation and will give another reason or excuse to your tormentors to harass you. Worse still, it will justify their actions in front of the managers. It is always important to discuss your professional concerns with your managers but talk when you are in a composed frame of mind. Preferable is to sleep over a current issue, come back more calm next day and then raise your concern.
There is always a subtle and reasonable way to find a solution to any problem. Do not wallow in self pity, look for a way out. For example, if you are not able to iron your differences with your manager or team members, seek for a change in department or team and start afresh.
If you are a manager and have a junior employee grappling with such concerns, you must try to be compassionate and advise the individual to exercise restraint.
Put yourself in their shoes rather than judging them for their behaviour. Conduct a one-toone discussion with to give him/her a valve for venting out.
(The writer is vice-president, HR, Sun Life Financial Asia Service Centre)